How to solve any problem...

[grooble]

Reroute it through the deflector dish.

 

[Aetius]

Don't forget the inverse tachyon beam! <img src="/images/icons/smile.gif" />

 

[Aetius]

You, good sir, have become a master of technobabble. <img src="/images/icons/wink.gif" />

 

[jmilsom]

Be careful though. Uncontrolled phase variance of the inverse tachyon beam, may cause a transmogrification of data emissions if channelled through the deflector dish. To control this a magnetic-cell hyper-string modulator may be useful. <div class="Discussion_UserSignature"> </div>

 

[grooble]

Don't forget the secondary phase relays!

 

[Leovinus]

Have Kirk talk the machine into destroying itself. <div class="Discussion_UserSignature"> </div>

 

[elguapoguano]

Perhaps if you use a derivative of the Heisenberg compensator tied through the main plasma conduit, re-routing power from the Warp engines, into the deflector array while venting gas from the Warp Nacelles, you could generate enough tachyons to induce a space-time vortex anomaly big enough to pass the whole ship through, which would transport you back to a place and time before the problem occurred. <div class="Discussion_UserSignature"> <font color="#ff0000"><u><em>Don't let your sig line incite a gay thread ;>)</em></u></font> </div>

 

[achernaruk]

Hmm.. yes, indeed. You could also consider calibrating the phase variant modulators to produce a resonance pulse via the anti-neutrino emiters, thus creating a gravimetric distortion in the fabric of space-time. This could however cause a resonance cascade within the anti particle emiters resulting in a break down of the warp core cooling systems.

 

[Swampcat]

Then just dump the core and proceed on impulse <img src="/images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />. <div class="Discussion_UserSignature"> <font size="3" color="#ff9900"><p><font size="1" color="#993300"><strong><em>------------------------------------------------------------------- </em></strong></font></p><p><font size="1" color="#993300"><strong><em>"I hold it that a little rebellion now and then is a good thing, and as necessary in the political world as storms in the physical. Unsuccessful rebellions, indeed, generally establish the encroachments on the rights of the people which have produced them. An observation of this truth should render honest republican governors so mild in their punishment of rebellions as not to discourage them too much. It is a medicine necessary for the sound health of government."</em></strong></font></p><p><font size="1" color="#993300"><strong>Thomas Jefferson</strong></font></p></font> </div>

 

[nacnud]

Er... Thanks, but I think I'll take the stairs

 

[strandedonearth]

If at first you don't succeed, get a bigger hammer.<br /><br />

 

[chew_on_this]

Two words, corbomite manuever!

 

[igorsboss]

If you used self-sealing stem bolts, you wouldn't have to use the hammer or the spare bolts. I know where you can get some, for just two bars of gold-pressed latinum.

 

[CalliArcale]

Being the Doctor Who fan that I am....<br /><br /><br />Solving a problem is simple. There are two basic methods:<br /><br />* Thump it.<br /><br />* Reverse the polarity of the neutron flow.<br /><br />By trying both of these, you are guaranteed to solve 95% of your technical problems. <img src="/images/icons/wink.gif" /> <div class="Discussion_UserSignature"> <p> </p><p><font color="#666699"><em>"People assume that time is a strict progression of cause to effect, but actually from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint it's more like a big ball of wibbly wobbly . . . timey wimey . . . stuff."</em>  -- The Tenth Doctor, "Blink"</font></p> </div>

 

[mcbethcg]

This issue is one of the things that I despise about Star Trek.<br /><br />The other, of course, is the wooden characters that have no vices or real conflicts.<br /><br />The new battlestar galactica series is much better in the second respect, at least.

 

[Saiph]

In the star trek universe, you must not, under any circumstances, regardless of how similar, try the same thing twice. What worked so well before, will not work a second time, despite how similar the situation is. Or it may, but I've never seen them try.<br /><br />There is no standard operating procedure in Star Trek. <div class="Discussion_UserSignature"> <p align="center"><font color="#c0c0c0"><br /></font></p><p align="center"><font color="#999999"><em><font size="1">--------</font></em></font><font color="#999999"><em><font size="1">--------</font></em></font><font color="#999999"><em><font size="1">----</font></em></font><font color="#666699">SaiphMOD@gmail.com </font><font color="#999999"><em><font size="1">-------------------</font></em></font></p><p><font color="#999999"><em><font size="1">"This is my Timey Wimey Detector.  Goes "bing" when there's stuff.  It also fries eggs at 30 paces, wether you want it to or not actually.  I've learned to stay away from hens: It's not pretty when they blow" -- </font></em></font><font size="1" color="#999999">The Tenth Doctor, "Blink"</font></p> </div>

 

[a_lost_packet_]

You're forgetting the Flux Capacitors! Don't forget them!<br /><br /> <div class="Discussion_UserSignature"> <font size="1">I put on my robe and wizard hat...</font> </div>

 

[grooble]

There's always belana torres

 

[earth_bound_misfit]

*Thump it*<br />That works well for most things eg, TV's, pedesidian crossings and computer escape keys (followed my the reset button).<br /><img src="/images/icons/smile.gif" /> <div class="Discussion_UserSignature"> <p> </p><p> </p><p>----------------------------------------------------------------- </p><p>Wanna see this site looking like the old SDC uplink?</p><p>Go here to see how: <strong>SDC Eye saver </strong>  </p> </div>

 

[cookie_thief]

And then there's the "subspace anomaly", which I blame for taking my last good sock!

 

[strandedonearth]

If at first you don't succeed, try reading the instructions...

 

[claywoman]

What? and clutter your mind with preconceived ideas? Never!

 

[vogon13]

Call 1-(800) DIRECTV<br /><br />They will tell you to unplug it for 15 seconds, then plug it back in and let it re-boot.<br /><br /><br /> <div class="Discussion_UserSignature"> <p><font color="#ff0000"><strong>TPTB went to Dallas and all I got was Plucked !!</strong></font></p><p><font color="#339966"><strong>So many people, so few recipes !!</strong></font></p><p><font color="#0000ff"><strong>Let's clean up this stinkhole !!</strong></font> </p> </div>

 

[vogon13]

Or you can just re-install Windows XP.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> <div class="Discussion_UserSignature"> <p><font color="#ff0000"><strong>TPTB went to Dallas and all I got was Plucked !!</strong></font></p><p><font color="#339966"><strong>So many people, so few recipes !!</strong></font></p><p><font color="#0000ff"><strong>Let's clean up this stinkhole !!</strong></font> </p> </div>

 

[vogon13]

Have you put new batteries in the remote?<br /><br /> <div class="Discussion_UserSignature"> <p><font color="#ff0000"><strong>TPTB went to Dallas and all I got was Plucked !!</strong></font></p><p><font color="#339966"><strong>So many people, so few recipes !!</strong></font></p><p><font color="#0000ff"><strong>Let's clean up this stinkhole !!</strong></font> </p> </div>