Top 10 things that would never happen on the Enterprise

[a_lost_packet_]

<p><BR/>Replying to:<BR/><DIV CLASS='Discussion_PostQuote'>I'm actually glad that anybody, especially young people, are in to any kind of science fiction at all. Data's cool, Troi's hot, but the TNG, IMHO, was, over all, a boring show. Capt. Kirk and company, were much more exciting little girl. <br /> Posted by ZenGalacticore</DIV></p><p>One of my favorite Kirk vs Picard vids..&nbsp; The Final Battle </p> <div class="Discussion_UserSignature"> <font size="1">I put on my robe and wizard hat...</font> </div>

 

[KMel517]

Re:

25) Data gets replaced by a hard light hologram named Rimmer

Now that is hilarious. I can actually see that happening. Red Dwarf a favorite of mine. Wonder why Starbook never encountered the Enterprise or better yet a Klingon battle cruiser? I often wondered that.

 

[JasonChapman]

gay klingons, ouch that's gotta hurt.

 

[bushwhacker]

Why with all the thousands of medical challenges encountered across the galaxy is an enema never the cure for anything ??... quoted from vogon

in the 24th century they just transport the crap out no need for an enema

 

[ZenGalacticore]

#28- Kirk gets a prescription for Viagara from Bones.

(Well, I don't know. Wearing those tight federation issue trousers could lead to impotency due to blood circulation problems.)

#29- Spock telling a joke. (Unless he got some more of those spores.)

#30- Dr. McKoy discovered passed out in his quarters with a bunch of spent hypos laying all around.

#31- Scotty can't find the keys to his liquor cabinet.

 

[StarRider1701]

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: So far. Very funny.

32. Janeway boinking Q, stealing his powers and becomming Queen of the Continium! (Oh yeah, that was Picards girlfriend...)

And Tom Paris didn't get VD, but he did get pregnant by an alien! Does that count?

I too liked Guinan, she was an interesting character who was important to several episodes. As I've said before, one of my favorite scenes was when she stuck a fork into Q just to verify that he had no powers! Very funny.

 

[crazyeddie]

And Tom Paris didn't get VD, but he did get pregnant by an alien! Does that count?

Are you confusing Paris with Trip in Enterprise? I recall Trip getting accidentally knocked up by an alien, but not Paris.

I too liked Guinan, she was an interesting character who was important to several episodes. As I've said before, one of my favorite scenes was when she stuck a fork into Q just to verify that he had no powers! Very funny.

I liked Guinan, too, but sometimes the intuitive abilities the writers ascribed to her were a bit over-the-top.

 

[OleNewt]

There are only 3 toilets on all the Enterprise-D according to the blueprints for the ship, so one of the things that would probably not happen is seeing someone go to use the facilities.

 

[silylene]

Re:

22) Counsellor Troi has a several minute long farting attack during a crucial discussion with Capt Picard on the emotional content of some alien's death incantation.

22) Counsellor Troi farts in the mud bath she is sharing with Cmdr. Riker. Blurp!

 

[StarRider1701]

And Tom Paris didn't get VD, but he did get pregnant by an alien! Does that count?

Are you confusing Paris with Trip in Enterprise? I recall Trip getting accidentally knocked up by an alien, but not Paris.

Yes, that was Trip not Tom. Wow, my old brain is going fast!!!

 

[ZenGalacticore]

TNG #1 (that will never happen)

Captain Picard doesn't call a meeting in the "Bored-room". And discusses how there will be no action, or good, dynamic story. And how--like most episodes of TNG--the episode is going to go nowhere.

TNG-

Space: The not-so-final frontier,
These are the continuing and now boring stories of the starship: Enterprise.
It was a five-year mission, cancelled after three, and should've been left as such.
To spin-off and try to recreate the magic of the original series with dismal failure,
To experiment with stories and plot devices and characters that absolutely bite mule ass,
To boldly screw up a good idea more than any good idea has ever been screwed up before...

Nah nah---- nah nah nah nah nah

[repeat]

 

[ZenGalacticore]

TNG #1 (that will never happen)

Captain Picard doesn't call a meeting in the "Bored-room". And discusses how there will be no action, or good, dynamic story. And how--like most episodes of TNG--the episode is going to go nowhere.

TNG-

Space: The not-so-final frontier,
These are the continuing and now boring stories of the starship: Enterprise.
It was a five-year mission, cancelled after three, and should've been left as such.
To spin-off and try to recreate the magic of the original series with dismal failure,
To experiment with stories and plot devices and characters that absolutely bite mule ass,
To boldly screw up a good idea more than any good idea has ever been screwed up before...

Nah nah---- nah nah nah nah nah

[repeat]

What kind of opinionated jerkwad member would say such a thing as the above?

 

[StarRider1701]

It was a five-year mission, cancelled after three...

Actually, that was the Original Star Trek.

Sorry Zen, but TNG had 7 or 8 seasons if I recall correctly. Or, in other words, more than twice as long as the Original which was supposed to be sooooo much better.

OK, so you were so mindlocked on the original Star Trek that you didn't allow yourself to enjoy the newer versions. We get it. You've only said it a few million times already! Jeez!

33. Worf quoting poetry at Q rather than bristling and growling on command...

 

[ZenGalacticore]

It was a five-year mission, cancelled after three...

Actually, that was the Original Star Trek.

Duh.

Sorry Zen, but TNG had 7 or 8 seasons if I recall correctly. Or, in other words, more than twice as long as the Original which was supposed to be sooooo much better.

There's something to be said for quality over quantity. And if it hadn't been for the popularity of the orignal, TNG and all the others would never had been produced.

OK, so you were so mindlocked on the original Star Trek that you didn't allow yourself to enjoy the newer versions. We get it. You've only said it a few million times already! Jeez!

Oh contraire. I've tried to watch TNG on 20 separate occasions.

33. Worf quoting poetry at Q rather than bristling and growling on command...[/quote]