I have no doubt whatsoever, that simple life is widespread throughout the billions of galaxies, each containing billions or trillions of stars with (together) trillions of planets. You have only to look at the diversity of life on Earth to see the adaptability present in diverse circumstances. Of course, I am referring here to microbiological and other simple offshoots thereof.
From such a myriad of choice, intelligent life will have developed, though perhaps only in millions of systems in each galaxy. So next comes the problem of communication. We should be considering not only the possible locations of intelligent life (distance), but the time span of such life and and the tim
ing. BTW, I am not putting numbers in a Drake Equation but just qualitative reflecting on the important factors.
The span of such intelligent communication possibility may be very limited. We have had the ability to send messages, or signals, for about 100 years. It is your guess how long or short, such a civilisation might last. There are other risks than self destruction which might operate, but the life expectation is going to be the flutter of a butterfly's wing in comparison to the (widely varying, perhaps 10 billion year) effective life of a star. This temporal separation of civilisations may be as, or more, important than spatial separation. Spatial separation is, of course, very important. Even if both spatial and temporal separations, and simultaneity, coincided (very improbable) for a star as close as Proxima Centauri, communication would be on an 8 year round basis. I am obviously referring only to electromagnetic communication. In practice, such a basis might exceed 100 years for an average star distance. Possibly longer than the life expectation of one or both participants. Failure by either party might be for many reasons including political or accidental influences.
Then, once communication is established, on a level of mutual recognition, there is the question of mutual understanding on a linguistic level.
I am not at all surprised that we have not entered into communication with an alien species, though we may even be receiving signals not understood by us, or possibly even originating from a long dead civilisation.
Cat